As humans, we thrive on communication - we love to talk and we love to be heard. We can use silence to get more out of our conversations, say less to learn more.
How can we do this effectively?
👉 The effective pause - An effective pause is a brief moment of silence, strategically placed at the beginning or end of an important statement to emphasize what you're saying. It's like adding verbal bold or underlining to reinforce your message.
This short pause grabs the listener’s attention, making them focus intently on your next words. Just be careful not to pause too long, or the other person may interrupt with a question, and your key point could be lost.
Silence—complete stillness without speaking—is a longer pause.
👉 When someone is speaking rapidly, staying silent allows you to better identify their problem. Letting them continue without interruption helps them maintain their flow of thoughts. Interrupting mid-sentence is like stopping someone in the middle of a sprint; they’ll need to start again slowly, rebuilding momentum.
👉 Silence is also powerful when dealing with dishonesty. After a questionable statement, resist the urge to respond immediately. Your silence signals doubt, often prompting the other person to reveal more or reconsider their position.
If the person is lying and asks if you are listening, respond with “Yes, and I want to ensure I record what you have said accurately”. This is a way of signalling that you disbelieve their last sentence and recording it for future reference.
👉 A further use of silence is when someone is reluctant to talk.
Generally, the less that someone is talking the more we have to talk as this will encourage dialogue. If this doesn’t work however then resort to saying nothing and wait for a response. They will eventually ask if you are still there and you respond with “Yes, and I want to hear what you have to say”.
Let's talk!
The Power of Silence!