Having still not come down two days later following a week on the road with people unknown to me, apart from my youngest daughter, it is time to reflect on how we need three things to align if we want to move forward from past trials.
The first time that Shelly Davies and I met was at a conference we were both presenters at. I knew of her work from following her on social media and was a little star-struck when she approached me. Why would this amazing person want to talk with me? A builder, who became a cop, who became a speaker.
We chatted only for only a few minutes ahead of my second presentation at the event. Then, seemingly from nowhere, I get a message asking if I wanted to go on a tour with herself and another person who I had never met, Alicia McKay. "Yes, of course", I said without hesitating for a second.
Crazy. Why crazy, because I am not someone who collaborates much these days as it never seems to work out for either party. I've had my intellectual property used without permission, had clients taken from behind my back using my relationship as the introduction, and I am sure they may feel that I have done the same to them.
So, why now? Because of faith, trust, and love. Faith that this time it was going to be great, trust that I can collaborate with others, love for the work that I do. That was my initial thought. It cannot be that surely, that's too superficial.
I had not seen either person perform on stage before or knew what either one of them were going to speak about. Extraordinarily, neither of them had seen me on stage either. They must have had faith in their judgement, trust that I would deliver, and a love for their work.
The first night was full of nerves but went so well that, for me, it was like the very first time that I was ever on stage. Unbelievably exciting. It was also like the first time I had jumped out of an airplane, the first time that I drove a car all by myself, the first time that I saw my wife. The excitement was like the first time of everything I had ever done in my life, rolled into one.
I never slept much that night, nor much for the preceding four nights. Each event for the next three nights felt just like the first night, but better. Each of us on stage having faith in the other, gaining trust in each other, loving what each of us do.
It wasn't until our flight was cancelled and we had to drive for five hours that I really knew the meaning of how having faith, trust, and love works when all three come together. I was asked if I was open to a suggestion about enhancing my presentation. At the age of 63 and set in my ways, I've never been one to readily accept help nor immediately take suggestions that well.
I said, "Yes" without hesitation. After being together in a pressure-cooker environment, I knew that the people who I have been working, eating, and sharing accommodation with for the last three days had something to offer. I had faith in their observations, trust in what they were about to tell me would be of real value and was given with all of their love.
Minutes before going on stage on our last night, I changed my presentation slides. No pictures, no bullet points, no colours. A black slide with a couple of words. Who does that when things have been going really well? A person who has faith, trust, and love in those around them and in themselves.
It is hard to tell when on stage as to how well one does, and I am not one to pass judgement on myself, but it felt unbelievably rewarding to have placed faith, trust, and love in others. I am told it was fantastic, the best yet.
I am humbled. Humbled that people who didn't know me had the faith to ask me if I was open to suggestions, humbled that they trusted I would accept their suggestions, and humbled that they showed me love so I could grow.
There are often people in our world who would like to help us. Often we don't take their advice because we have been hurt before or perhaps reject their help because we think we know better. Maybe it's because it doesn't feel right, the timing isn't great, or you are just hesitant.
If the help offered to you is given in good faith, if it is given in such a way that you trust them, and if done so with love, accept it. If you are someone wanting to help others: build their faith in you, gain their trust, and help them with all of your heart, with love.
Faith, trust, and love. When these three things come together, great things will happen. Have faith in what you can do, learn to trust others, and love yourself as much as you love others.
Let's talk!