"We all have our cross to bear" was a way I once dismissed other people's challenges which I deeply regret to this day. I was ignorant. I was uncaring. I was selfish. Then, depression came along and changed me, for the better I hope. I was awakened through knowledge and understanding.
I would venture to say that there is not one amongst us who does not have something significant going on in our life that consumes our thoughts - financial hardship, domestic violence, racial bias, bullying, physical health issue, aged, even death - all of which takes a toll on our mind-health (mental health).
Because of this, we each become vulnerable at some point. Vulnerable to anxiety, depression and major health problems. Statistics state that 1-in-5 of us will have a mind-health challenge in any 12-month period, 1-in-2 of us in our lifetime. The statistics are wrong, in my humble opinion.
It might be the work that we are involved with that brings a bias, but I am yet to speak with a person who has not been, is now, or on the verge of being in a vulnerable situation. More so today following Covid-19. And, it is set to get worse unless we do something about it.
Having recently spent a week with a major government contact centre (MBIE) coaching on how to manage vulnerable customers, it is apparent that more and more of us are becoming vulnerable given the increased volume of calls from such people. The biggest contributor seems to be financial hardship closely followed by health issues, physical and/or emotional.
Furthermore, it's not just their customers, it is the staff who deal with vulnerable customers who are also at risk.
Not only are they managing vulnerable people, they also have their own personal challenges just like the rest of us have. Emotional dissonance is a major issue for the customer service industry, being asked to react in a way that is counter to what we as humans would want to react if we feel attacked or emotionally attached.
What can we do to help those of us who have, are, or may be on the cusp of becoming vulnerable? Just like my earlier awakening, knowledge is the key to understanding. Understanding what is going on with the majority of us is a great start, understanding that each of us does have a cross or two to bear at any given time, and understanding that we can help with empathy without becoming vulnerable our self.
The biggest single thing that we can all do, whether managing a vulnerable customer or when talking with a colleague or friend who is in a vulnerable situation is to listen. Listen without fixing.
The next thing we can do is to acknowledge their situation - "Thank you for sharing", "I appreciate you telling me what is going on", "I can only imagine what you are going through", "That must be difficult" - and so it goes. An emotion that is acknowledged is disarmed, validated as they say in psychology.
The third thing that we could do is to share, only if appropriate to do so - "I had something similar happen to me", "You are not alone in what is happening", "Sadly this is becoming more common" - to tell the person that they are not alone. It is normal to feel this way.
Only if applicable, only if you have established a good rapport, and only if you are genuine, you could ask - "Have you told anyone else", "Are you getting any support", "Would you like me to provide you with details of an organisation who might be able to help".
Leaving a vulnerable person in a vulnerable position without offering support leaves them vulnerable still.
If you are reading this post and are in a vulnerable position, reach out, right now. If you do not know who to reach out to, reach out to us and we will provide you with guidance. No cost, no strings attached, nothing needed from you except for you to trust us, to trust me who has been in a similar place to you. Because we trust in you.
Let's talk!